aiya aiya

update.

i'm truly sorry for being late yesterday.. TRULY AM. idk, after i received that call, i just want to rest my head and SLEEP FOREVER. I cant bear it anymore, it's too much to take in. I"M JUST USELESS. ya spell that out, U-S-E-L-E-S-S. Useless to my mom, my team mates, EVERYONE, why i am here still? tell me? why cant i do anything good? everything just turn BAD, WORSE because of who? ME!!! ME ME ME !!!! I HATE MYSELF. when i reached school , the teacher was scolding me, shouting at me, i dun even care, i just mumbled sorry to him, and surpressed all my feelings inside me, and walked like a TRULY ZOMBIE. feelingless. i cant hear what the teacher said, it's seems his voice was very FAR AWAY. i cant concentrate what was veron saying to me, all i can see is , a moving lips, trying to console me, i dunnoe why suddenly my tears came down, without me acknowledging it, i dunnoe why suddenly my fingers press to my mum's number, and asked her how was she, i dunnoe how i trained, just hit the ball anywhere, i dunnoe why i just punch the wall, kicking it, without noticing, i dunnooe why i shouted out of anger, i dunnoe how i trained, ALL I COULD REMEMBER IS, keeping my smile, a fake smile, to everybody in my team, trying to focus, but I JUST CANT!!!!!!!!!!! I STILL BROKE INTO ANGER, where i involve everybody, and let them see. I"M USELESS! i cant even control my feelings. EVEN TODAY, i tried to hide it, hide everything inside me, but i still show my anger, kicked the ball so hard, i cant even spike the ball, dig the ball, all the ball just go out of place, EVERYTHING IS OUT OF PLACE. my mind is out place. EVERYTHING. mdm salina told me to LET IT GO. I TRIED, I TRIED SO HARD, BUT WHEN THE MORE I THINK OF IT, THE MORE ANGRY I BECAME. I TRIED. so hard. i cant even help myself. i cant even talk it out to my friends, i cant. i just cant. I HATE MYSELF. I"M USELESS AND PATHETIC. i'm even more pathetic to blog about this. NOBODY will understand. how i wish yesterday, i would sleep forever and everybody will forget about me, and i wont have to worry about anybody.

i hate myself.

thanks for consoling and try to cheer me up. I TRULY APPRECIATE IT. but sorry i cant help it, cause i'm useless. sorry.

and 4 days to go...

time flies~~~

6 DAYS MORE TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH YEAH!!!!!

shit shit

SHIT yesterday i dun have time for 8 days, count down to nabilah's birthday... sorryyyyyyyyyyy
so....

8 DAYS(yesterday)

7 DAYS (today!)

to nabilah birthday!!!!!!

9 more days

9 MORE DAYS...... TO YOUR BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

COUNT DOWN

HEY, LET'S DO COUNT DOWN FOR THE NEXT 10 DAYS, BECAUSE THE NEXT 10DAYS, IT WILL BE SITI NABILAH BTE SIDON'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! SO LET'S!

TO SITI NABILAH BTE SIDON

IN 10 DAYS TO YOUR BIRTHDAY!

SO 10......

VERY INTERESTING HAHA.

this what i found months ago, hahaha forgot to post bout it. so here it is. IT really describes me well. =) hahaha it's very true. LOLs. have fun reading!



AQUARIOUS WOMEN

If you are in love with a woman in this zodiac be prepared to be very happy or be very sorry. She is a very busy person with her own matters similar to a guy in this zodiac. She is able to live by herself without any guy in her life, a very strong person indeed.


Not because she does not have a dream guy, but if she can not find such person, so what. Because she thinks she could do anything that a man can do. She is a leader , a real confident type.


She likes to do things by herself, such as serving herself, opening the door herself. Because she thinks waiting for a helping hand is a waste of time, and she is not patient enough to wait around for that.If she starts to ask you out, do not think she starts to flirt with you, but because she thinks it is a waste of time to wait for you to be the one who asked.


She likes a COOL guy who sometime act like he is ignoring her, so he has a chance to show him his own confident. She like to guess her man's reaction, but at the same time she likes to has many men wanting her. She is a daring type who could just do thing differently from other people in her same society. She dare to fight for what she thinks belonged to her.


Even she acts confident she mostly feel lonely and alone. If she breaks up with someone , she won't show any emotion even deep down inside pain and agony. Not for long she will come back to be the cheery and merry person again, because she looks at the world positively and has "Faith" in the word "Love".


She has more men friends than women friends, so do not be a jealous type if you date her. She could be slightly jealous, but she hates jealous guy. She loves "Freedom" so before and after marriage , her freedom has to be the same. She likes you to trust her, even if she does not trust you anyhow.


She likes to be the one who is "Right", so if you argue with her ,let her win if it is not a big deal for you in that subject. She is a straight forward type, so if she does not love you anymore, she will just tell you straight to your face. Her love and relationship are always real, so if she say "It's over" be prepare to leave, she is not testing you.


She is not a vulnerable type, so do not have to worry about her, she will survive by herself. If she is with you when you get sick, she will certainly take care and look after you, even look after you mean"small loan". Do not have secret with her, she hates it and really can piss her badly. When she is sad , be understanding. When she is happy, be happy with her, she likes that.


You will not get bore with this type of girl. Someone who is close to her will know that deep down beneath that confident and cold hearted person, she is just as fragile as any woman. She is a fun and talkative person and she likes to tease you. Do not let she talk alone, if you do she will leave.


She has many type of jobs because she beliefs what a man can do, I can do. If you want her to work for you, forget it. When she is in love, she will just leave her job in the day time just to come to see you, but not for long she will go back to work seriously again.Prepare to live and love with a "Working Woman" then you will be OK.


If she mad, find a shelter for the "Hurricane" is here! Her badtemper will last very shortly though. She is not a revenge type and will not think of "pay Back" time. Most people might think of her as"One of a guy", but in fact she is a 100% woman. She is easily hurt,so be nice with her. If she really loves you, then you are luckybecause she is an honest, truthful and will never bored you.Understand that sometimes she will be over confident and sometimes like to have power or act bossy.



WOW. lols. ppl who knw me well. THEY WILL FIND IT TRUE. LOLS. i'm an aquarious women. LOLS
hahahahahaahaha.

long time no blog-ging

YO!
long time no blogging.
i feel bad for abandoning this blog of mine(NOT!) lols.
i'm not busy these few days, but just LLLAAAAAZZZZZZYYYYYYY to blog.
hehehehe....

so now.... i'll just blog about.... NOTHING. lols. i dunnoe what to blog seriously. ok i'll just blog what are my most favourite things NOW. lols

TRANSFORMERS!!!!!!!!

I've watched it TWICE! and i'm so gonna watch it again. LOLS. and i'm optimus prime's gf!!!!!! LOLS hahahahahhahahahaha kidding . lols, optimus prime is so HOT.LOLS, weird~ i knw.... but i cant help it, his character is so HOT! hahahhaahhahahaha.
optimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprimeoptimusprime
OMG, i'm obsessed with transformers! LOLS! hahahahah

and my song on my blog right now, is by linkin park, new divide, OST(original sound track) of TRANSFORMERS. see??? even the song is nice! lols. hahahhahahahaha. EVERYTHING about transformers is SUPER DUPER NICE!!!!!!
and i knw, most of the guys watch transformers because of MEGAN FOX. No doubt she's one hot chick. OR should i say, she's not a chick at all?? i dunnoe, i've heard some rumours that she's a guy?? dunnoe what went to plastic surgery thing. BUT dont trust the media right now, cause they are all CONS! lols, come on, one thing they say about something something, we have to believe it. SOMETIMES, it's a TOTAL lie! i really dunnoe, unless Megan Fox herself declare, that she's guy, then we can believe it. But, megan fox has not say anything about it all???

UP TO YOU GUYS. =) none of my business also. lols hahahah.

SOOOOOOO, that's it i guess. LOLS.
wait, one more thing, before i forget.. hehehehehe

AM I FAT??????????

haiz i knw, i'm fat....... =( geez, i need to go on a hunger strike. dun eat for 3 days, and diet diet diet diet diet. i've been dieting for 3 months already and i'm still like this. geez, i think i should take slimming pills. =D ya i should!

but where to find??? lols.... my mum can recommend me some, though she will be against it, i will force her, and persist her! muahahahaha.

ok that's all. buh-bye=)